The hubby and I aren’t the most extroverted personalities. We tend to not go out without each other (to work get togethers, or to meet new people). My coworkers have for weeks been trying to get me to go out for drinks after work. Finally a time was arranged and the husband was going to go with me (they were down with that).
First, I should clarify that I believe all my coworkers (at least the ones I went out with) all know my husband’s transition situation. This is because they know that we have been married for 22 years, while same-sex marriage is only legal for 2 years so they eventually just came forward and asked.
We show up at the place (Joey’s, an upscale bar like place outside the local mall, evidently players from the Seattle Seahawks go there a lot). Like expected it was fairly expensive place (most of my coworkers here are GS 12, while I am still only GS 9 and won’t hit 12 for another 18 months, the difference is about 25k starting a year between the two grades). We were prepared and it wasn’t a big deal, but it definitely wasn’t a place we would frequent.
However, by the time we got there evidently we had missed a couple of rounds of drinks. My coworkers had loosened up and were joking around (definitely more loosened up then I feel comfortable doing myself in a dinner setting). The language and subject matter at the table was of course not repeatable (my coworkers have the dirtiest mouths/minds) but they all were very very accepting of the hubby. I do think there were questions that wanted to be asked, but it was polite.
The only negative part was one of my female coworkers kept misgendering the husband. I want to say first that she was pretty well hammered, so I don’t personally get too offended (and the hubby didn’t either). She wouldn’t have ever known that the hubby went through a transition if I hadn’t talked to them, so it is always a mildly uncomfortable interaction for that reason.
Here is a pic of the two of us (hubby and myself). I don’t think it is the most flattering for me (was tempted, but no photoshopping), but we have so few pictures together that I will take it! I love that little man so much.
So that was our first trip out, shortly thereafter some sort of discussion on Judaism and if people could convert broke out inappropriately among my cohorts. The funny thing is I suggested they ask our Jewish coworker who was sitting with us (and he was happy to explain) but they didn’t want to ask. Yep, it went pear shaped even quicker after that.
We successfully extricated ourselves, got home and swore to never do that again :).