Twenty-five years ago, my husband looked at me and said “I do”. I thought that would be the happiest moment of my life, but it wasn’t. Instead, today is the happiest moment of my life, and each day is just getting better.
For our twenty-fifth anniversary on Halloween of 2017, we were boring old people. He had cooked us dinner of salmon and some side dishes, and I cleaned the kitchen and we enjoyed a quiet meal together.
Afterwards we laid in bed and watched some shows and just talked about our day. We even found it funny that our cat ghost had to force himself in between us, because evidentially it isn’t allowed we touch each other, we both have to touch him instead. We avoided any conversation involving work and his transition. We just spent time with each other. It was a magical evening.
We had originally planned a to-do for our “big 25” that included a Los Vegas wedding vow renewal with dueling Elvis Impersonators, a pink Cadillac. We had been surprised at how relatively cheap it was for a renewal ceremony, even with the hotel and flight down. Sadly, our life has been pretty hard with work and the death of both of my parents who were our only real familial support. Additionally, were trying to pay back the debt from paying for both of their funerals. Instead, we chose to stick close to home.
Even so, our anniversary was spectacular. I have no regrets about how we spent the time. Just lying next to my husband, hearing his voice, and feeling his skin against mine (when the cat wasn’t objecting). It was a fantastic night of us just being together as lovers, spouses, and best friends.
I think back to when we first got married, and truth be told, I didn’t know what the future held. Many of my friends had divorced within a year or two. At the time my husband made it clear that he was like a stray cat. He believed he would never get married, nor have a long-term relationship and that we should just enjoy the time we had together. He put this forward for years as his ideal relationship, but in the end he had asked me to marry him. I wasn’t sure what time would bring, and I anticipated he would have grown bored soon enough and moved on. Yet here we are.
All I can think of now is that our marriage brought me something far beyond anything I could have hoped for. I never imagined I would be in love with a guy, and that the sight of him would excite me mentally, emotionally, and physically. That he would have been the same person, with the same green eyes who was a cute punk girl who crawled in my window at the age of 19 because I left “her” cans of Ravioli’s for when she was hungry.
Twenty-five years is a long time to some. It literally was a lifetime with my wife as her life ended and the life with my husband started. For me though, it hasn’t been long enough. I feel confident we will probably get another twenty-five years, or more if I have my way, and it still won’t be long enough.