Just a brief bit of background, Jello and I have been on and off poly for most of our marriage. I haven’t found anyone I really want to split my time with him with, but it is always a possibility. Jello has been more interested in finding me someone lately, since I do like the ladies, and he isn’t a lady, but nothing has sparked my interest yet.
However, barring all of that, I do keep an OKCupid profile. I have met friends on OKC, I have several people who chat with me on it (in a non-sexual/dating way) and I am totally out about being married to a transguy on OKC, (I am always proud of Jello). However today I got the most bizarre request.
It started out like this:
Did he even read my profile?
I was angry at first that he referred to Jello as my wife. The disrespect of either not reading my profile, or worse yet not respecting my husband. I was speechless for a short time.
I was then struck with the sheer audacity, assholishness, and fuckery of someone asking another person for pictures of their spouse. Nowhere in my profile do I say we are looking for a third, or that he is asking for a partner himself (Jello). At what point does a spouse or partner offer up pictures of their S.O. to a random stranger on the internet.
I responded that he obviously had failed any sort of reading comprehension and that I had a husband.
It isn’t over… Within ten minutes of my response he dug deeper:
First the idea that he was direspectful to me seemed even more ludicrous. My husband (or as he thought of it, my wife) isn’t my property. He should be apologizing to Jello through me, or even better both of us.
I was considering responding when 3 minutes later he asked for pictures of Jello… WTF!?!?!
Why would anyone follow up on that except with straight cis-gendered privilege. I was shocked the most by that last comment. I haven’t responded, but I think I have an EXTREMELY TINY glimpse of what a woman goes through on OKC.
I gave Jello a copy of these images (unredacted). He is busy posting it to http://straightwhiteboystexting.tumblr.com. There is a huge backlog, so not sure when it will appear, but it was funny.
Jello’s response to all of this, other than to call the person an idiot, was if he was looking, he would be on OKC (which he isn’t).