This morning Jello and I went to IHOP. We have just moved to our new place, and this is our real first meal out. We showed up and it was semi-crowded with the early morning Sunday crowd.
The young man who was the host politely led us to our table and we sat down. He went through his normal spiel and looked down at Jello and myself and asked if he could do anything more for me “sir”.
I had this horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach as he turned to Jello. When he did, the magic words came out of his mouth.
“Can I get anything for you ma’am?”.
I froze with that uncomfortable feeling, and at the same time I saw Jello freeze as well. He left and we looked at each other and I could feel the cringe in my face. Jello took it really well, its the first time in weeks I have heard him misgendered and not a big deal.
A few minutes later the host came back around to ask if we wanted something to drink. I told him water and Jello told him tea. He said he would bring it to us and referenced me as “sir” and Jello as “ma’am” twice more. I couldn’t keep my mouth shut at this point.
I told him that he needs to say sir. He looked confused and I repeated it twice. He still didn’t seem to understand until Jello looked up and said “I am a guy”. The host looked horrified that he misspoke. I do have to say at that moment he confirmed it wasn’t intentional. He stammered an apology and even when he brought our drinks he averted his eyes in shame. Is it bad I thought he should feel that?
All the other people at IHOP (and the guy at AT&T) all identified Jello as a guy, so I think that reassured him. It was just an awkward moment, that happens much less now. I think in another year no one will second guess.
Just wanted to share an awkward moment with all of you.