I woke up this morning really upset. It was a stupid and emotional upset that I am sure is based on the anxiety and stress of a possible new job, having to move into an apartment I won’t get to see before we move into it, and money worries. I woke up really upset that I never got a professional studio photo of Jello and I before he transitioned.
I realize this is ridiculous, I have Jello, I love Jello and I don’t have any regrets on his transitioning. It was just my mind reaching for something it could freak out. I have plenty of pictures of him as my wife marking our marriage before the transition.
It was only for a few minutes that my anxiety and regret hit, but I thought it would be good to post it. To reassure anyone else out there that is the partner of someone transitioning, that it is normal to have momentary regrets, and anxiety attacks.
I wish there were more support groups for spouses. I think a significant other goes through so much with this. You have to shift how your sexuality is perceived, deal with folks dumping us for me, and everything about your world is trans, trans trans for a bit. I really think it would be good to be able to go vent, and talk to folks that understood what it’s like.